You Don’t Know What You

Strange turn of events: two chickens have joined our flock, and by flock, I mean pride of pussycats. These chickens came from a previous address, where a benefactor had decided they were meat, but residents named the chickens, making them pets. It’s a sentimental distinction. You could have a pig, name it Precious Loveydovey and still look forward to delicious smoky bacon. Many people do. These chickens came here last Sunday and already Pete’s collected four eggs; when he has eight, we will bake a celebratory souffle. I’m thinking it’ll be broccoli.

Our eyes met across an empty coop.

Our eyes met across an empty coop.

The arrival of the egg-laying chickens has caused us to reevaluate the chore chart at the Handmade House. The hens eat dandelion greens, other weeds and bugs and produce eggs. I have asked the cats what they contribute to the household. I can’t be 100% certain, but I believe they’re secretly updating their resumes.

We Are Billion Year Old

Apologies, Poor Impulsives, for the lateness of this, but it’s time for our 2015 annual report. Lest you think this is something serious, here is a picture of Drusy, Queen of our House and a 6 lb. cat who seems to live on air and chin scritches alone:

Ferocious!

Ferocious!

This started out as the Cat Blanket Project. The Lovely Georg, Ceiling Cat Remember Her With Fishy Treats, asked friends to knit or crochet blankets for animal shelters, which I did. But then people from all over – possibly including you – sent me yarn in large boxes, and agencies/organizations ask for yarny help. So! You trusted me with art supplies. This is what I did with them in 2014, and last year:

cat blankets These go to Georg or to a shelter with which Georg is in contact.

baby blankets A hospital near me has a baby blanket project. A friend coordinates. I try to make blankets early in the year or if I have a long car trip or a lengthy illness. You know: if I’m sitting, I’m knitting and I buy special yarn for this.

scarves There are a number of projects that ask for scarves. I send or deliver them all over the place. Mostly, I buy yarn for this that I think will be fun and soft to wear.

hats Several agencies ask for hats for infants, children and adults. Infant hats are quick to crochet, but I’m still learning adult hats. Mine are still a little odd.

lap blankets There’s a chemo facility nearby that asks for lap blankets for patients. I send these through a friend. She feels they are greatly appreciated.

In 2015, 52 blankets went to animal shelters, bringing our humorously inaccurate total to 307. This total is both too many and too few because I started counting a little later than the people at the post office began frowning at me. Also: I’ve been struggling to turn out 50 blankets a year, but I’ve learned to crochet and can now turn ’em out faster.

Two baby blankets went to the hospital project. Auntie InExcelsisDeo contributed a beautiful quilt.

Thirty-seven scarves went to the men’s shelter, the soup kitchen and the unnamed university’s anti-hunger project. Eight hats, and four hat+scarf pairs went to the same agencies.

Fortunately or unfortunately, I sent other things hither and yon, but forgot about them. Late last year, I gave up thinking, ‘That was a metric buttload of work I’ll never forget,’ before promptly forgetting, so now I write down what I’m sending out as I do it. Today, we have temperatures hovering around 1 entire degree, so Pete and I dropped off some scarves. When I pushed open the soup kitchen door, dozens of men sat at tables, doing little or nothing. Everyone was very nice, but there were no empty seats. These were just the men who took shelter there, not even the soup kitchen’s regular clients. I waved and smiled as they thanked me – for something or nothing, I didn’t know. But I was there, I guess.

It’s almost unbelievable to me, but I’ve almost stitched my way to the end of everything donated to the cat blanket project. If you’d like to contribute, let me know. If you have suggestions for how we can do more or better or know of an agency looking for help, that news is welcome too. Please keep in mind: I’m a terrible knitter and cats don’t care!

Everything All the Time

It’s November, when the unnamed university lets me work on its food pantry project and I try to do six other things at the same time. Between that and trying to hibernate, I’m a wreck! I forget which one of us is me. You’ve heard me yap about this a billion times. I think that’s you.

We were wearing the same outfit. I was so embarrassed.

We were wearing the same outfit. I was so embarrassed.

This afternoon, I tried to lie down for a nap, but could only think of tasks I should be ticking off. I got up, but then cats curled up on me. I am stuck hoping we can hibernate together.

Kittens Cats Sacks Wives

The Drusy-approved project room is a work in progress. On the left, cat blankets; center, scarves and hats for whichever project asks; on the right, loosely organized ideas and a photo of my grandfather from The Gang That Couldn't Shoot Straight. This evening, I accidentally shut Wednesday in this room by accident, a foible of which Drusy also approved.

The Drusy-approved project room is a work in progress. On the left, cat blankets; center, scarves and hats for whichever project asks; on the right, loosely organized ideas and a photo of my grandfather from The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight. This evening, I accidentally shut Wednesday in this room by accident, a foible of which Drusy also approved.

Your Servant Is Your Master

My goal for the cat blanket project is to turn out at least 50 every year. Late last week and more than 200 blankets into the project, it suddenly dawned on me I don’t have to knit them – because crocheting is way faster – and they don’t have to be rectangular or square.

This is an IQ test I both passed and flunked.

This is an IQ test I both passed and flunked.

The blankets can be round, like cats, when cats are sleeping. This is proof that eventually I will have a great idea. Probably. Count on that!