The Village The Peaceful Village

We’re about to have houseguests and chaos and July is my favorite of the months. I am trying to enjoy every July day, because I miss it every day that is not in July. Like, every one. That’s quite a few, so every day, I am saying out loud, “It’s July, which is my favorite.” If this sounds to you like I’m brainwashing myself, you underestimate my ability to argue with me, because I am also like, “August is boss, Ta.”

Don't forget to floss!

Pride Month brought out all the dudes.

Obviously, there’s a lot to be said about June, too.

Who’s To Blame?

(With apologies to the B-52s)

Surprise! Party!


Yeah, we just thought we’d drop in!

drop in

Where’s your icebox?


Where’s the punch?


Eww, House-a-tosis!


Who’s to blame when parties really get out of hand?

party gone out of bounds

Who’s to blame when they get poorly planned?

poorly planned

Crashers get bombed


Slobs make a mess

actual villain

Ya know sometimes they’ll even ruin your wife’s dress

George And Laura Bush Attend Groundbreaking For Bush Presidential Center

Crashers gettin’ bombed. (Who’s to blame?)

who's to

Can you pull it back in line?
Can you salvage it in time?

out of bounds

What can you do to save a party?

a party gone





A spur-of-the-moment scavenger hunt,

scavenger hunt

Or Queen of the Nile?

queen of the nile

Who turned out the lights?

turn out the lights


bombed - 1

Crashers gettin’ bombed,

bombed - 2

Crashers gettin’ bombed,



bombed - 4


bombed - 5


bombed - 6

Well, who’s to blame?

to blame

Who’s to blame when situations degenerate?

blame 1

Disgusting things you’d never anticipate

People get sick, they play the wrong games

the wrong games

Ya know, it can ruin your name!

Crashers gettin’ bombed. (Who’s to blame?)

who's to blame 3

Can you pull it back in line?

in line

Can you salvage it in time?

it in time

It shouldn’t be difficult!

Try not to condemn!


O.K. who ordered pizza?

I’ll be tactful when making the rounds

Be tactful when making the rounds

tactful when

And maybe you can save a party…

Debt Showdown

Party gone out of bounds!

completely out of bounds

Gone out of bounds!

disastrous and stupid

Images and videos courtesy of the Intertubes. Thank you, Intertubes.

Might Be Big Big Fake Fake Lies

Why doesn’t the whole world smell like coconut sun tan lotion? It might protect us from the weeks-old santorum:

Those politics don’t play well in Riva del Garda, a community of ultraliberals. On the campaign trail, Santorum often touts his grandfather’s flight from Italy “to escape fascism,” but he has neglected to publicly mention their close ties with the Italian Communist Party. “Rick’s grandfather Pietro was a liberal man and he understood right away what was happening in Italy,” Mrs. Santorum told Oggi. “He was anti-fascist to the extreme, and the political climate in 1925 was stifling so he left for America. After a few years he returned to Italy with his wife and children, including Aldo, Rick’s father, who passed away late last year. It’s a shame he won’t have the joy to see his son’s success in his bid for the White House.” She goes on to explain how the family then became pillars of the Communist Party in Italy.

“There are Santorums who would roll over in their graves to hear [Rick’s] rhetoric.”
The matriarch lauds her distant relative as a “masterpiece” of the family, whom she calls a man of high intelligence and integrity. “He would be a great president,” she told Oggi. “But if he wants to make it, he will have to soften some of his positions. To take a stand against homosexuality or to oppose divorce is harmful. Principles count, but in politics one must have the capacity to be open-minded.”

The Oggi piece also quotes an angry cousin who preferred to voice his dissent anonymously, remembering the time when high-ranking Communist Party members frequented the Santorum household in Riva del Garda. “There are Santorums who would roll over in their graves to hear [Rick’s] rhetoric,” he said.

But the rest of the family seems content to turn a blind eye to their American cousin’s political persuasion. One cousin, Michela Santorum, told Oggi that she fondly remembers Rick’s interest in his Italian heritage, and especially Italian cuisine. “We were always astonished at how many ice cubes he put in his drinks,” Michela told Oggi. “But he loved everything else, including polenta.”

According to Oggi, the general sentiment is that the Italian Santorums will forgive their American cousin if his bid is successful. “When he wins, he will send the American presidential airplane and take all the Santorums to the White House,” Bruno Santorum told the magazine.

Well, Bruno, at least Jimmy and Billy Carter were two separate people:

SANTORUM: They are taking faith and crushing it. Why? Why? When you marginalize faith in America, when you remove the pillar of God-given rights, then what’s left is the French Revolution. What’s left is the government that gives you right, what’s left are no unalienable rights, what’s left is a government that will tell you who you are, what you’ll do and when you’ll do it. What’s left in France became the guillotine. Ladies and gentlemen, we’re a long way from that, but if we do and follow the path of President Obama and his overt hostility to faith in America, then we are headed down that road.

I’m sorry, cugini. Your ambitious American cousin hates immigrants almost as much as he hates himself and history.

And She Was Holding My Right

The last ten minutes of last night’s 48 Hours made me so angry I was still stomping my foot this morning. You can watch it here, but I’m warning you: you will come away howling. And though it’s a story about murdered women and dismembered body parts, you will know whose head has got to roll.

Pete says the cop is setting someone up. What I hear is a man blotting women out.

Added In the CBS interview, the cop says Shannan Gilbert got disoriented in the woods and drowned. Erin Moriarty gives him several opportunities to walk that back, but he doesn’t. Here we find this nonsense in another form:

Theories going around the past couple weeks were that she got disoriented trying to navigate the mud and thicket, and possibly fell, got stuck and drowned. This should come at some relief to her family who have been searching for the girl since she went missing in May, that it was a random accident and not a sinister and sexually motivated crime by some sicko. Still, getting trapped and dying in a swamp seems like something more apropos for the dessert, the mountains, or the Everglades and not a quiet little beach community on the South Shore.

Gilbert was last seen knocking on a stranger’s door and acting irrationally before she vanished, so clearly she was distressed and not thinking properly, or under the influence, which would not have been unusual in her profession – working as prostitute.

IQs plunge when people talk about prostitutes. No opinion is too stupid to articulate. Most of the victims were women and one was either a fetus or an infant. They were people. And the police are now saying there’s a serial killer on Long Island who dumped bodies in a small area and Shannan Gilbert, fleeing for her life, stumbled into that area, accidentally got separated from her clothing and belongings and drowned.

Yeah. That happened. Sure.

Second addition Ah! Transcript found. Here is where I shouted at the TV.

In most of these cases, police sat on missing persons reports – losing not only time, but valuable evidence. In Shannan Gilbert’s disappearance, security video at the Oak Beach gate that could have provided important clues was apparently recorded over. Shannan’s jacket, which Joe Brewer says sat in his driveway for days, may have been lost.

“This is a tough question Commissioner, but, if that had been a wife of a resident there who had made this panicked 911 call and then suddenly disappears, wouldn’t there have been much more of a search than there was for Shannan Gilbert?” Moriarty asked.

“No, I disagree with you – strongly,” [Suffolk County Police Commissioner Richard] Dormer replies. “Number one, when the officer responded, he didn’t know that that was a sex worker. …he conducted a search in that area. … this was a normal – if there is such a thing – normal missing case of an adult. And the officer responded.”

“This wasn’t normal,” Moriarty says. “She was hysterical. She said, ‘they’re trying to kill me’ on the phone. This wasn’t a normal missing case.”

“I don’t want to, in any way, say that we didn’t do the right thing that morning,” Dormer responded. “The officer – we looked at his actions and he searched that area that morning, which was appropriate…”

And, says Dormer, they have devoted unprecedented manpower and resources to finding Shannan.

“We kept going back there over the months…and never gave up,” he said.

So far, I was only shouting about how a frightened woman is a frightened woman, no matter what job she does, but then there was this that sent me over the edge.

Asked if he believed Shannan Gilbert was murdered, Dormer told Moriarty,” There’s no evidence whatsoever to show that anyone was out to harm her that night…”


“She clearly was in fear for her life,” noted Moriarty.

“Now, we’re awaiting results of the medical examiner’s examination of her remains. And so we have to have an open mind on that,” Dormer said. “But I would caution right now that we don’t believe that she was a victim of foul play…”


Even though the autopsy is not yet complete, the police commissioner says he believes a disoriented Shannan ran into the tangled brush of the marsh – possibly trying to make it to the parkway – and accidentally drowned.

“But does it make sense, Commissioner, that her belongings would be found in one spot, including her clothes and her body a quarter mile away?” Moriarty asked.

“That’s explainable because she’s hysterical,” Dormer replied. “And she’s discarding her possessions as she moves along.”


“But her clothes?”

“Well, her jeans could have come off from running in that environment,” Dormer explaine[d], “and that is a possibility that the jeans came off and she kept running…”


Vernon Geberth isn’t buying it.

“Did she take her clothes off before she went for a dip,” Geberth asked. “I think that the fact that her purse, her cell phone, and her pants were found in this location and her body someplace else is highly consistent with someone dumping the body and getting rid of evidence.”

Yes. Yes, it is consistent with dumping a body, isn’t it? It’s the Long Island connection, but when Dormer talks, all I hear is the Mayor of Amity refusing to close the beaches as the corpses pile up.

What It Don’t Get I Can’t Use

Loseriffic comments from YouTube:

If you run up unnecessary costs on banks, they’ll pass them on to consumers. They won’t stop lobbying congress. They’ll cut jobs before that, they’ll raise fees before that. I would have thought this was a super cool stick-it-to-the-man move in high school. But it’s not. It’s a waste of resources and time.


In this case, the back of the cave is decorated up right purty, has nice curtains with really cute fringe. tinybones is a prisoner of tinybones, not the banks.

Yeah, like a CEO is gonna worry about this. All they’ll do is get rid of the envelopes making poor people pay an extra $.050 or so to mail their bills. Do you really think banks are that stupid? If you want to get a executives attention, this won’t do it. Any action that adds costs to consumer items in the end only punishes the 99%.


Aparently guipiwan has never heard of credit unions, community banks and electronic billpay. The system’s rigged, man! Let’s go serfing now! Everybody’s learning how!


The guy is telling people to commit mail fraud and pretty much has screwed himself as now he’s posted evidence to have him charged with conspiracy to commit mail fraud and other charges. Not smart as its a felony.

Mail fraud: Reach any fraudulent scheme or artifice to intentionally deprive another of property or honest services with a nexus to mail or wire communication.

While I think the banks are dirty and that there is a need for OWS to continue to grow, this isnt the way.


No. This is not mail fraud. This is simple business reply mail. It says that in the envelope’s upper right hand corner. The business has asked you a question. You are sending an answer. Thanks for the gumball, Mickey!

Booo. While initially funny, the underlying message is scary and sad. People like this need to stop playing the victim and get a life. You think the mail clerk is gonna do shit with a shingle? He’s gonna throw it in the trash. Stop protesting things that have already happened (lets do a protest against past wars, why don’t we) and propose some solutions. Most of the people protesting have no business doing so anyway.


Injustice bugging you? Oligarchs up your ass? Get over it! You weren’t using your ass anyway, were ya, whiner?

Omigod, morons are EVERYWHERE. Meanwhile, I stopped at the little old man’s cramped but homey hardware store and bought my new set of tools. I’ve been sending back envelopes to the women’s orgs with nine pennies and a note that says I WILL NEVER GIVE YOU ANOTHER DIME, and to the DCCC I’ve sent testy manifestos, but from now on, it’s shims and shiny words.

Crime-fighting kit and critical thinker Topaz.

A little direct action is good for what ails us.

Time We Might Still Get

Things are changing:

Emotions ran high Wednesday night as well over 100 protesters packed city council chambers to address some of the concerns surrounding the death of 46-year-old Barry Deloatch who was shot and killed by city police on Sept. 22 on Throop Avenue.

A letter presented to the council by Walter Hudson, of the Community Awareness Alliance, cited requests to the council to hold a public hearing to discuss police misconduct, pass a resolution condemning the actions of the New Brunswick Police Department, and send a letter to the family offering the council’s condolences for the shooting.

“At some point we have to sit down, at the round table, [and] come up [with] a plan of action to change the structure of the New Brunswick Police Department,” he said. “It’s either you’re going to work for us, or we’re going to work against you.”

City Council President Robert Recine agreed to draft a letter of apology to the Deloatch family. While members of the council agreed to the public meeting as per the requests of the protesters, an official vote approving the meeting was not taken.

If the city council does nothing, the protesters will continue to attend the city council meetings, Hudson said.

Many of the protesters felt the police officers involved should be arrested and charged with a crime.

“We have to do something,” said Henry Torres, a longtime city resident now residing in North Brunswick. “I don’t know what proposal we’re going to come up with, but I guarantee you one that we definitely need is some cops that are not going to be harassing us every day.”

The council responded to these claims by noting that state law dictates that all officers undergoing investigation must be placed under administrative leave for the duration of the investigation.

The case is currently under investigation by the Middlesex County Prosecutor’s Office.

One protester said he believes this poses a conflict of interest, stating that many of the police in the Middlesex County Prosecutors Office may have connections with the officers they are investigating.

So far: the only thing different from what’s happened before is that the council isn’t sneering.

[Protester Henry] Torres suggested that city Mayor James Cahill and those who were a part of his administration at the time of city murders resign and also assist the Deloatch family with the funeral expenses.

Cahill said at a meeting at the Ebenezer Baptist Church on Oct. 4 that he would be open to discussing the city becoming involved with the funeral expenses.

The council would not respond on Cahill’s behalf, but Recine offered to contact him immediately.


Two things:

1. Murders? Plural? If that’s not a typo, and I think it is not, which other murder or murders are we talking about?

2. The mayor’s vague agreement that the city might accept responsibility for some funeral expenses is about as clear as it indicators get that Cahill thinks this murder is a murder.

This is not going to go away.

Gods Who Are Any More Vengeful

Between the Republican debate and the Tea Party debacle, I wondered when someone on television would turn to the camera and say, “This, friends, is what genuine crazytalk sounds like. This goes beyond requiring medication; it is so far gone that I’m going to ask you not to make eye contact with this herd of thundering bewilderbeests in the hope that we can get the studio audience safely out of the building. Hush. No sudden moves, please. Audience, please make your way to the fire exits and, for fuck’s sake, don’t look back.”

The more no one turns to the camera and sternly declares crazytalk is a danger to us, the greater that danger becomes. I hope you have BandAids and First Aid Cream. It would not be too much to strap on a helmet.

In the old days, before we tried bombing Afghanistan back into a Stone Age it never left, you might’ve pictured Wolf Blitzer falling on this grenade. In 2011, you hope Blitzer doesn’t feed you to the bewilderbeests. He would, you know. Bewilderbeests have teeth, and Blitzer fears anything sharp, like Ron Paul. Think I’m kidding? Ron Paul is so prickly you could cut yourself on his chitinous shell and Blitzer will have none of it!

Wolf Blitzer is concerned.

Seeing this – and this guy – I don’t really know what to say anymore. The statements have become so outlandish it can be difficult to recognize the genuine danger belied by the cartoony talk. Abolish Social Security? Saying something that stupid should disqualify a person from holding public office. Raise the Medicare age? Should be cause for a public inquiry into which pets and children that guy’s abusing. Cut Medicaid? Elderly people should spit on that public speaker. War without end? Please accept this plane ticket to the Hague on behalf of sane people everywhere. Cut food stamps and defund poverty relief programs? Excuse me, there’s a Mr. Jesus to speak with you. He looks upset. Hurry. He’s got a 4:30 with some bankers.

A Man Afraid Has No Shame

I had to work up the nerve to watch this video. Of course, I live in Jersey and stuff blowing up is kind of – well – normal, but even so, I was not sure I was prepared for what I might see. Turns out the explosion itself is rather banal now that we’ve all watched the Mythbusters blow up non-dairy creamer just for kicks.

CNN’s Larry Kudlow may have the money quote for this terrible -even horrible – disaster:

“The human toll here,” he declared, “looks to be much worse than the economic toll and we can be grateful for that.”

Larry – I will be calling him Larry because I’m too freaking lazy to type That Vomitrocious Ghoul over and over – has long forgotten the Heroes of Chernobyl, who saved Europe. That story wasn’t widely reported in the West and not at all until much later. Granted, it’s hard to remember history when this is the morning’s news.

About 2,000 bodies found on coast of Japan’s Miyagi-Kyodo

March 14 (Reuters) – About 2,000 bodies were found on Monday on two shores of Miyagi prefecture in northeast Japan following last week’s massive earthquake and tsunami, Kyodo news agency reported.

That’s the entire news report. This human toll is not Larry’s problem. In fact, even as explosions continue to rock the imploding reactors, you can expect Larry to segue neatly into what investors are doing in three, two, one…

There’s No Reason Why I Heard That

This is a fucking execution.

See it. Know it. The little kick after the poor guy drops dead is a nice touch. It’s done in our names.

In related news, the motherfucker who gave us the Department of Homeland Security and paramilitary cops finally answers for his perfidious perfidy.

Senator Joseph I. Lieberman will announce on Wednesday that he will not seek a fifth term, according to a person he told of his decision. Mr. Lieberman, whose term is up in 2012, chose to retire rather than risk being defeated, said the person, who spoke to the senator on Tuesday.

“I don’t think he wanted to go out feet first,” the person said.

And speaking of feet first, the King of Doctor-Killers just keeps coming back.

Randall Terry, founder of Operation Rescue, will announce Thursday that he will challenge President Barack Obama in the 2012 Democratic primaries.

Terry is perhaps best known to Floridians for his role as the spokesman for Terri Schiavo’s parents and for his challenge of state Sen. Jim King in the Republican primary in 2006.

“My constituency is the millions of pro-life[sic – and I mean that./Ed.] advocates who want to make child-killing illegal from conception until birth,” said Terry on Tuesday. “My base is those who know that we must show Americans the victims of abortion, in order to restore the full protection of law to unborn babies.”

Terry, who has backed graphic ads of abortion procedures before, hopes to run ads during the 2012 NFL playoff games, including the Super Bowl.

“America has never truly debated child-killing, because America has never truly seen child-killing,” insisted Terry. “We will use FEC and FCC laws for federal candidates to bring America face-to-face with this massacre of the innocents.”

I am exhausted by the effort of everyday living and this authoritarian, misogynistic, blindly zealous douche bounces back year after year like a particularly dickish superball. Meanwhile, my sister, surrounded by family members who have had abortions, squawks, “Roe v. Wade will never be overturned” and votes Republican. Frankly, I’ve had enough of the stupid and determined.

Dear Furry Overlords,

I do not belong on this planet, and your fur is boss.