I Got Six! That’s All There Is!

Over a week ago, we talked about this over the phone.

Siobhan: For my birthday, I want to go to the movies, then have dinner out.
Tata: So exciting! What would you like to see?
Siobhan: Harry Potter, even though I’m planning to see it this weekend.
Tata: Okay, and where would you like to go to dinner?
Siobhan: A bar where they bring us snacks, we can talk and eventually have dinner.
Tata: Any place in particular?
Siobhan: Yes. One place means we can talk to each other. If we all go to separate places, we’re merely harassing strangers until the cops come.
Tata: We should smuggle booze into the theater like we used to for school assemblies. I’ll never forget those seventh grade health films I can’t remember.

Siobhan picks me up early. We meet Dom in the theater parking lot and a herd of Siobhan’s friends inside. It’s a good thing we came early because the kid behind the counter takes no less than 16 minutes to assemble three popcorns and three sodas. Siobhan picks a row where we all sit together. I save a seat for Gary. It’s been a long time since he and I were in the same room. Just before the lights dim a little for previews, Gary edges along the row and sits next to me. I’m next to Siobhan. We are more than a dozen people.

After the three-hour movie, we beat a hasty retreat to the ladies’ room. Outside the restroom, a pack of men and listless children wait like Mom’s flight’s just arrived at JFK. Exiting the facility takes a concerted effort and near-military precision. When we arrive at the bar, our plan goes to hell. We can’t sit together, we can’t move around and we can’t all talk to one another. We divide up into two parties. Siobhan’s cousin Dominique’s name is very similar to mine so we studiously avoid sitting next to one another to further avoid looking like a matched set. Dom’s sitting at the next table. Anytime someone shouts, “Dom!” everyone looks around wildly. Miraculously, no one spits stuffed mushroom.

Siobhan: …so I turned Harry Potter into my own private drinking game.
Dominique: What? When?
Siobhan: That movie we just saw. Everytime someone mentioned poly potion I took a swig of rum.
Ginny: You did what?
Siobhan: Poly potion! Bottoms up! I called Gary and told him to bring a bunch of airplane bottles.
Tata: I didn’t know we were going to do that! It was really fun!
Siobhan: You didn’t know? It was your idea.
Tata: I have lots of ideas. Who can tell if they’re good or bad?
Siobhan: That’s what we have me for!
Ginny: You smuggled rum into the movies?
Tata: I poured mine into my diet soda.
Dominique: You were drinking in a kids’ movie?
Tata: When the lights went up two hours into the movie I thought they were gonna throw us out!
Ginny: When the lights went up…
Siobhan: You were there! Remember when the lights came up and the movie was still playing? The lights are on a two-hour timer during the three-hour movie. We thought they were going to toss us out!
Tata: Or give us detention. I thought that, too!

We’re too old to be bad girls. In fact, now that Miss Sasha’s married, I should search catalogues for fishnet stockings in toddler sizes. Does Kenneth Cole make hip flasks and little old lady fedoras? I hope so.

I still wanna be anarchy.

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