The Only Part That Wasn’t Bloody

White guys are fucking confused. This editorial is on the front page of today’s Star Ledger, which should be confusing enough:

President Obama is a fine man, but he just got rolled by Republicans again.

He wanted a grand bargain, and they said no. He wanted a balance of spending and tax changes, and they said no again. And now, with 14 million Americans out of work, he’s about to sign an agreement full of job-killing spending cuts. This, he tells us, is good for the country.

You get the feeling that if they kidnapped his dog, he would pay them money to return it. And say thank you.

The solution here is obvious: Obama needs a blood transfusion from someone meaner, someone who doesn’t shy away from a fight, someone who is willing to take his case to the people and force change.

He needs a dose of Gov. Chris Christie.

If there is anything that should tell us our pundit class has gone ’round the fucking twist, it is admiration for bullies by people claiming to defend the defenseless. This front-page editorial on the online paper is titled Moran: President Obama needs a dose of Chris Christie. What are we saying about Christie here? Is he strong medicine? Is this sexual innuendo? Skin lightener? The paper itself says something entirely different.

What Obama’s missing:
The guts of our governor

That’s so offensive you might almost overlook the fat joke.

Cross-posted and re-written for Brilliant@Breakfast to include at least a few complete sentences.

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