Last Thursday afternoon, I was tooling around in my car and slapped the radio’s on button. The signal was inexplicably tuned to WDHA, which calls itself “the Rock Of New Jersey.” I didn’t even hear the beginning of the bumper, but the DJ asked, “Have you heard the new Theory of a Deadman single? It is sooooooooooo funny.” And this is what he played.

Then I was finished with WDHA forever. Further, it is my fond hope that women everywhere avoid the prime specimens of douchetastic doodhood that are Theory of a Deadman.