This car-car is a paper weight-weight.

Tata: My car is in four pieces.
Corinne: Four pieces? What happened?
Tata: Pete took it apart while Mercury was retrograde, but now that Mercury’s gone direct, special tools have started arriving.

My sisters snickered.

Tata: Just before Thanksgiving, our housemate came home with a frozen turkey he didn’t know what to do with, so I offered to drop it off at Elijah’s Promise.
Anya: Oh yeah! Good idea!
Tata: Well, you’d think so, right up ’til the moment you pull up to the soup kitchen in a Mercedes.

My sisters’ jaws dropped.

Tata: And it doesn’t matter how your husband acquired the Mercedes, because suddenly –
Anya: YOU’RE THE WHITE LADY ASKING IF THERE’S VALET PARKING.