But the Earth Is All We Know

Despair, Inc.

Email can save your sanity.

Tata: Got any gum?
Darla: Nah, I’m trying to quit. Smoking cigarettes seems to help.

I haven’t lit a Lucky in three years but I might need a carton and an intervention after this.

The United Nations suspended relief supplies to Myanmar on Friday after the military government seized the food and equipment it [sic] had already sent into the country.

Earlier, in a statement, Myanmar’s military junta said it was willing to receive disaster relief from the outside world but would not welcome outside relief workers. Nearly one week after a devastating cyclone, supplies into the country were still being delayed and aid experts were being turned back as they arrived at the airport.

In the statement, the government said it would distribute international relief supplies itself.

Yes, and I am the Doublemint Twins, which makes it easier to turn the other cheek several times.

The U.N. World Food Program said on Friday it would resume aid flights to cyclone-struck Myanmar, despite the military government’s seizure of deliveries at Yangon airport.

“The World Food Program has decided to send in two relief flights as planned tomorrow, while discussions continue with the Government of Myanmar on the distribution of the food that was flown in today, and not released to WFP,” Nancy E. Roman, WFP’s communications director, said in a statement.

The U.N. food agency had previously said it would suspend aid flights over the seizure.

In other news, my appointment to get my long luxurious tresses re-blonded couldn’t be better timed. This evening, Carmelo and I will discuss great gobs of hilarious nothingness, which will prove theraputic and result in a certain shallow happiness for me. Otherwise, I might stay home and desperately quilt nicotene patches.

But You Don’t Wear No Perfume

Blogger has been giving me trouble again. I’ll figure it out. In the meantime, what is it about this painting of Johnny’s that I find utterly arresting? Got me! I can’t stop looking at it.

This morning, I wish I could post the scent on the breeze coming off the river and through the trees. Wait, hold your nose up really close to the monitor. No, closer! Closer! Smell it?

You’re So Unbelievable

George Vomvolakis, lawyer for accused stalker Jack Jordan, said,
“To me, her fear seems a little exaggerated.”

Clearly, women armed with kitana swords have nothing to fear from note-wielding schizophrenics besides paper cuts and copier jams but that’s beside the point. We live in a society where movie stars have the right to tantalize us with their super yumminess, far exceeding whatever yumminess non-movie stars can muster in these yumminess-deprived times – and yet we have no recourse to threaten suicide if they choose not to let us, individually, grab a spoon and slurp. I for one am outraged, but not as publicly outraged as the note-wielding schizophrenic’s lawyer, Mr. Vomvolakis, who over the weekend actually said into microphones – and here I must cut to the bone – har har! – until I can find supporting video – that while he supposed Miss Thurman might see his client’s behavior as threatening “no normal woman would.”

His mother must be so proud.

Correction: Video here. At :46 to the end, Mr. Vomvolakis says, “She may very well be a very sensitive person and thus was reacting the way she was. I don’t think that – that most people would have been – most women in that situation would have been reacting the way – the way she did.” Nice.

Words Get Stuck On the Tip Of Your Tongue

The blurry view from Pete’s kitchen door on 3 March. Note the living room’s irritating green trim and the infected snot yellow walls.

We’d painted the dining room a rich red and the trim a bright white. While the living room was that odd yellow and green, the dining room looked like it’d beamed itself inside the house from Planet Awesome and nested resentfully.

Today, the living room is a creamy pumpkin with bright white trim, which victory did not come easily. The green trim did not go quietly. No, it put up a squawky fuss for old paint. I spent a lot of time on a ladder with trays of white primer, a roller and a fine brush. Pete spent a lot of time refereeing the fight. Eventually, new paint – and by extention, I – won. Yay we! When I wasn’t looking today, Pete cleaned and oiled the leather couch. I suspect television viewers will slide off the sofa with Must See TV glee.

Pete fought a war all his own with the fireplace. Originally, the house came with four walls of mirrors above the mantle. Pete pulled down the mirrors, pulled down the tar construction adhesive (that took a week), spackled and sanded the walls. Then he stripped the simple oak mantle, sanded, sanded, sanded some more, stained, stained, stained and polyurethaned. In this case, I can’t assure you that what you see is what Pete sees – for one thing, because I’m too short to see this view without a ladder. What I can tell you is Pete positively beams when he looks at the mantle, which is about eight feet long. Don’t forget that wall in front of you is actually the same creamy pumpkin of the last image. Your colorful mileage may vary.

Go back to the first image. In the lower righthand corner, observe the dining room radiator. It is faded, dirty and blah. This afternoon, I was vigorously priming a blushing linen closet when Pete said, “Hey, lemme show you something.” I’d heard that line before but not outside a public park so I followed him to the dining room where the radiator was suddenly silver. I screamed! I cackled! I howled! Sweet fancy Vishnu, that radiator is exactly what I pictured when I proposed we paint the dining room red. The chair is a supple antique teak, as is the low china cabinet. These warm colors and textures together maybe shouldn’t work but – they do! It’s madness, but even more: directly behind a person examining this tableau is a door to the basement we took off its hinges and in the backyard I sanded into submission. Later, we stained it a few times and today Pete poly’d it. This room glows.

It’s not for everyone but it breaks my heart.

Reach Out And Touch Fate

Five years and hundreds of thousands of dead later:

Bush, in October 2003, disavowed any connection with the “Mission Accomplished” message. He said the White House had nothing to do with the banner; a spokesman later said the ship’s crew asked for the sign and the White House staff had it made by a private vendor.

“President Bush is well aware that the banner should have been much more specific and said `mission accomplished’ for these sailors who are on this ship on their mission,” White House press secretary Dana Perino said Wednesday. “And we have certainly paid a price for not being more specific on that banner. And I recognize that the media is going to play this up again tomorrow, as they do every single year.”

She said what is important now is “how the president would describe the fight today. It’s been a very tough month in Iraq, but we are taking the fight to the enemy.”

At least 49 U.S. troops died in Iraq in April, making it the deadliest month since September when 65 U.S. troops died.

Now in its sixth year, the war in Iraq has claimed the lives of at least 4,061
members of the U.S. military. Only the Vietnam War (August 1964 to January 1973), the war in Afghanistan (October 2001 to present) and the Revolutionary War (July 1776 to April 1783) have engaged America longer.

Bush, in a speech earlier this month, said that “while this war is difficult, it is not endless.”

Some things are not forgivable. In the eyes of the world, we are untrustworthy, craven and brutal, and we will pay for this belief for generations, even if we were to withdraw our troops tomorrow and empty our treasury for reparations. There was never a reason to invade Iraq and no reason to believe anything good can come of it now. Our leaders are war criminals. The best thing that could happen to us as a nation would be the arrest, prosecution and punishment of everyone who had a hand in this evil imperialist misadventure. Then maybe we could learn to trust ourselves again.

Instead, we seem ready to destroy ourselves.

The US defence secretary, Robert Gates, said yesterday the deployment of a second aircraft carrier to the Gulf could serve as a “reminder” to Iran of American resolve to defend its interests in the region.

Gates denied the arrival of a new carrier represented an escalation, pointing out that US naval strength in the Gulf rises and falls constantly with routine naval deployments, but it comes at a time of heightened rhetoric from Washington about Iran’s role in the Iraqi insurgency.

In the next few days US officers in Baghdad are expected to mount a display of recently-made Iranian arms alleged to have been seized from insurgents.

CBS News reported the Pentagon has ordered commanders to explore new options for attacking Iran and that the state department was formulating an ultimatum calling on Iran to stop arms smuggling into Iraq. The reports were denied by US officials.

Happy anniversary, America.

Some Want To Fly Isn’t That Crazy

My co-worker whom we Poor Impulsives call Chuan was born in Singapore and emigrated to New Jersey as a small child. A few weeks ago, Chuan and his two sisters spent two weeks visiting China, where one sister works. It was, judging by the pictures, a grand adventure. Here, Chuan kicks up his heels at the Hall of Supreme Harmony, which was under construction. It’s quite possible I might be a little jealous, but of what? Maybe the once-familiar escape from the iron grip of gravity.

Today, my dear friend Lala forwarded a reminder that history is nothing if not a bitch.

The women were innocent and defenseless. And by the end of the night, they were barely alive. Forty prison guards wielding clubs and their warden’s blessing went on a rampage against the 33 women wrongly convicted of “obstructing sidewalk traffic.”

They beat Lucy Burn, chained her hands to the cell bars above her head and left her hanging for the night, bleeding and gasping for air. They hurled Dora Lewis into a dark cell, smashed her head against an iron bed and knocked her out cold. Her cellmate, Alice Cosu, thought Lewis was dead and suffered a heart attack. Additional affidavits describe the guards grabbing, dragging, beating, choking, slamming, pinching, twisting and kicking the women.

Thus unfolded the “Night of Terror” on Nov. 15, 1917, when the warden at the Occoquan Workhouse in Virginia ordered his guards to teach a lesson to the suffragists imprisoned there because they dared to picket Woodrow Wilson’s White House for the right to vote.

For weeks, the women’s only water came from an open pail. Their food – all of it colorless slop – was infested with worms. When one of the leaders, Alice Paul, embarked on a hunger strike, they tied her to a chair, forced a tube down her throat and poured liquid into her until she vomited. She was tortured like this for weeks until word was smuggled out to the press.

I don’t know who wrote that, but it rang a distant bell for me. I’m ashamed to say it but I’d forgotten who Alice Paul was, so I looked her up. Imagine my chagrin:

The Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) was introduced in every session of Congress from 1923 until it passed in 1972. During the 1940s, both the Republicans and Democrats added the ERA to their party platforms. In 1943, the ERA was rewritten and dubbed the “Alice Paul Amendment.” The new amendment read, “Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex.”

Fuck! I forgot Alice! Did you remember Alice? This is a blog post about Alice. Back to the letter of unknown origin about HBO’s Iron Jawed Angels:

It is jarring to watch Woodrow Wilson and his cronies try to persuade a psychiatrist to declare Alice Paul insane so that she could be permanently institutionalized. And it is inspiring to watch the doctor refuse. Alice Paul was strong, he said, and brave. That didn’t make her crazy.

The doctor admonished the men: “Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity.”

This would be an excellent, life-preserving moment to remember the unbelievable courage that brought us – all of us – to where we stand – or fly – now, because our politics have gone crazy.

This Is For the Discotheque

Saturday afternoon, I found my sister Corinne staring at the shelves in the family toy store, conversing with a teenager whose resemblance to the fair Georg was startling. The teenager was an acquaintance of Corinne’s, which was news to me. The question at hand: birthday party, present, another teenage girl nobody really knew well. Suggest a gift. Ready….go. I made a long, long list.

Block of Velveeta. Dryer lint. A pineapple. A bag of cat litter. All the colors of PlayDoh conveniently pre-mixed, which would save lots of time. Pot pourri and a broom – for parades. Like on Fractured Fairy Tales. Safety matches. You could need those! A snow shovel. It’s, like, an investment. For an hour, I babbled about gifts because that’s what stores are for when I’m in them. The whole time I was thinking about this Barry and Levon bit, because the best gift I ever got was in three huge Korvette’s bags: enough boxes to make 240 lbs. of banana pudding.

Aw yeah.

Some things, kids have got to discover for themselves.

And Things Were Looking Like A Movie

A little while ago, Pete walked out to the fence to take that nightly picture we’ve neglected for the last week. As he framed this shot, he heard people talking, then saw them and their sleeping bags in the dark on the other side of this fence. Startled, he turned and walked back. Just then, a cop car materialized in the cul-de-sac and Pete waved. “There are people sleeping behind that fence,” Pete said.

I wouldn’t have done that, but Pete did because his tiny, middle-aged girlfriend sleeps 20 yards from this fence and he’s alarmed. The river people were down closer to the bridge and at river level a few days ago. I haven’t worried about them, but with a third night of rain predicted, I’m worried for them.

If they’re still there tomorrow, I should make them sandwiches.